Wednesday, 26 October 2016 12:40

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On Friday June 17th the Management Forum for Women and Children Victims of Violence (local language abbreviation, FPK2PA) gathered at the Village Hall, Ngalang. The event is a regular meeting scheduled in Ngalang whereby FPK2PA groups can learn about violence in the family. FPK2PA feel the need to understand this because in the Ngalang village there is still physical and verbal violence against children such as; cursing, hitting and kicking, and violence in the home. Heni, who served as Chairman of FPK2PA in Ngalang, is currently assisting cases of child violence in the village where he grew up. "According to the current mentoring process, the children are the victims of their parents which impacts the child’s progression in school and the relationships of this child," said Heni.

For Atun who is also a member of the FPK2PA board in Ngalang, working in counselling services, and learning about domestic violence is not easy. For her to talk about personal family experiences is a challenge because of the taboo around this issue.

This initiative is the work of approximately 15 people, starting with a forum on the implementation of the scheduled programs for the next 3 years. In 2016, as the initial program planning, FPK2PA will submit the budget to the village. It is part of the village's commitment to encourage efforts to prevent violence against women and children. This process is also an opportunity to review village legislation in Ngalang, such development has typically been done by women's groups in the villages. They participate in rural development through discussions and educational organizations.

The discussion started with a reflection about the self, about life experiences, past experiences, and any instances of violence from each person present. In this process the participants drew a picture of what they had suffered. One of them, whose name is Lia, the mother of a child who was treated at the village medical clinic. In the paper she was had bruised lips. Images that she created all had a story that she was often angry with her son because her son often annoyed her. "My children constantly ask things of me and it can frustrate me and I can become very angry very quickly," said Lia. Although afterwards she was sorry and felt terribly sad. This experience led her to reflect on not doing it again to her son.

Another story also came from Atun, she drew a hand on the red paper. She told a story of when her son was little and she would always impose her will and desires on him. Atun acknowledge her behaviour has had effects on her son. She also realized what she had done has made her son insecure and decision-making is a difficult task for him. She was sad and sorry about what she had done and admitted this was not good parenting. But now she realizes, that before she was caring out of ignorance. "Now I do not want that to happen again, I implement positive parenting and will encourage my children grow into confident and socializing evolving environment, "said Atun.

The event provides skills and supplies for participants. Furthermore FPK2PA members will continue to visit villages and to share such information to the public. These lessons will also continue to contribute to the strengthening of the capacity of facilitators who will return on 23 to 24 June 2016. Fitri is a facilitator of discussion and shared personal reflection and that itself becomes knowledge that can be discussed. "We can learn from the experience of everyone's life," said Fitri.

Translated by: Emma Hardy

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